Britt5091 Origins: Tonight, I go to war

Welcome to Britt5091: Origins, where I dig up old blog posts I used to write for IGN’s community under the username Britt5091. Some posts may make you giggle, some may make your eyes bleed, and some may make you stroke your beard in a pensive manner. All you need to know is that these posts, no matter how terrible some of them may be, ultimately lead to everything I do now.


Tonight, I go to war…

July 4th,  2009 

…with fireworks. That’s right ladies and gentlemen; let me introduce you to the 5th annual TNT Turtles VS Tanks 4th of July war.

Before I introduce our minions, let me take a brief moment to explain what this thing is.

I’m sure you’ve seen the little kiddy fireworks, such as the tanks,turtles, trucks, etc. These excuses as fireworks kinda roll around and emit “showers of sparks”…weee.

Five years ago I got an idea. Why not take these rolling kiddy items of gunpowder and turn them into something FUN? I brought the idea to my dad, and gave him the choice of either choosing the Turtles or Tanks. He of course chose the Tanks, leaving me stuck with the Turtles.

We marched to the stands and bought roughly 10 of each, set them on a big piece of plywood and let them have at it, endearing many burns, scratches and accidental mini fires along the way. We’ve been evenly matched. However, it seems while the price of my dad’s Tanks are going down, the prices of my Turtles are SKYROCKETING; therefore I’ve been forced to scout for different allies.

So tonight we face off again. Let me introduce the forces.


These don’t fly, actually. Both sides has a pair.



So the battlefield is set, temporarily on a dining room table, anyway. That’s part of the tradition too :D

We’re getting ready to take these outside and due for fuse lighting in a few minutes. Here’s the catcher: I’m outnumbered by 6, but I have more firepower.

Who do you think is going to win the 5th annual Turtles vs Tanks?

I’ll post results and pics tomorrow!


Britt’s Note:

GOOD. TIMES! I love this tradition I have with my dad. For this year’s battle (2011) I even made a video of the epicture. Ooh. epicture. I like that word.

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