This May Be a Little Farfetch’d…

BAHAHAHAHAHA. I just read this out loud for the, like, twelfth time in a row and it causes me to have the funnies EVERY. TIME. Oh, man. I’m so glad I stopped mentally maturing after the age of eight — life is so much more enjoyable. “Until Abra, Kadabara, Alakazam! I pull out my Weedle…” Bwahahahaha. Okay. Ahem. Time for composure.

Yesterday I wanted to write up a brief Pokémon blog, during which I planned to whine, bitch and complain about Nintendo’s failure to bring us a console Pokémon title since — in my eyes, anyway — Pokémon Snap. (Sorry, the Stadium games just didn’t do it for me.) Anyway, I was going to go on this tirade because one buzzed night last weekend I found out Nintendo had a “big” Pokémon announcement slated for today. So, I did what any slightly buzzed gamer would do. I went to Facebook.

Obviously, don’t feel obligated to read all of the responses, but there’s some good conversation in there! Scratch the mention of my virginity, that is, thanks to my dear friend Ryan.

I never got around to my bitchfest post, but eh, whatever. Like Peer said above, it’s obvious that they Japanese Nintendo team considers Pokémon to be a handheld shindig — clearly — so I just need to put on my big girl pants and accept that! (Although, let’s be honest, I never will. I WILL GO TO MY GRAVE WANTING A CONSOLE POKEMON TITLE!) And it’s not like I have anything against handheld gaming — you could say I just don’t get along with it. Hell, I couldn’t even finish one of my all-time favorite games, Final Fantasy IX, on my PSP because I dislike having to play on such a small compact handheld device manbearpig. I prefer to do my gaming slouched into a couch, controller in hand, head straight and a TV in front of me. (Bonus points if a plate of hot wings is at my side!)

But in any case, I must admit the newly announced Pokémon X and Pokémon Y are looking preeeetty bitchin’, and this just might, MIGHT convince me to purchase a 3DS XL.

Okay, forget what I said above. After watching this trailer again, I’m sold. Maybe by the time October rolls around I’ll feel handheld-deprived and ready to give handheld gaming another shot.


(Also, the end of the above sentence totally looks like an algebra problem.)


  1. I read that to myself and have had a stupid grin on my face ever since. I can’t imagine what would happen if I heard that read aloud…(not a hint at all that you should totally make a video of yourself reading that aloud).

    As for these new Pokemon games…meh. I beat the shit out of Pokemon Red and Pokemon Silver, skipped the GBA games completely, and got about halfway through Pearl before I finally swore off this series (well, the main games anyway). The games are too similar for my tastes, just the same old mechanics with a new coat of paint splashed on. And butt fugly new Pokemon added in.

    • Hahaha — noted. A video needs to be made then. :)

      Yeah, I hear ya. I’m thinking since it has been sooo long since I’ve really dived into the Pokemon games I’ll have a fresh-ish start <3

  2. My dreams were always a little more fantastic. When I was 8 I wanted them to genetically engineer real Pokemon or open a dimensional portal to the Pokemon universe so I could go there.

    Considering I still live at home though, I do not know if I would have been successful leaving home at the tender age of 10…

  3. I have a theory…

    They’re called X and Y because of the chromosomes, meaning you can now breed pokemon with a pokesex minigame. It will be super basic, but inspire controversy among all parents.

    They’ll call it “Hot Koffing.”


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