Resident Evil Restaurant is a Thing

 

So, um, I don’t know about you but after watching this video I’m about 1/12th of a second away from packing ALL OF THE THINGS and heading to Tokyo because, um, yeah DO I REALLY NEED TO ELABORATE!?

I would LARP so hard in that restaurant. And to prove it to you, I’m about to reveal a never-before-seen…er, told, fact about myself.

GET READY.

When I used to work in a boring, drab office building that was centered in the middle of nowhere, the only escape I had was either A) My handheld gaming devices or B) books. One time I went through a reading spree where I blew through all of S.D. Perry’s Resident Evil novels (for the umpteenth time, I might add). Now, anyone who has worked at an office building knows to read at your desk is basically saying “HEY! I’m at lunch reading a book, but feel free to bug me with your stupid questions or gossip to me about the new intern!” So oftentimes I would venture to this little one-person room called the wellness room. The wellness room consisted of nothing more than a recliner, a desk and a lamp.  More importantly the room came with a solid wood DOOR you could use to separate yourself from everyone else in the building. (I think people used the room to take blood pressure, pump bewb-milk, nap, etc.)

Into the wellness room I would go, book in hand, and lock myself in the one-person room for an hour at a time and read. The Resident Evil novels I were reading were based off of games RE: 0 -Code Veronica, so I was reading about my favorite characters doin’ Resident Evil old-school and cautiously tiptoeing down dark hallways, exploring secluded rooms and coming to grips that the moans, groans and freaky noises bouncing off of corridor walls were coming from zombies and other genetically mutated freaks.

Soooo I would, um, sit back in the recliner, turn off the lights, turn on the lamp (which would cast an eerie glow about) and pretend I was in one of those secluded, hidden rooms in Resident Evil. I had it mentally envisioned as a save room, y’know with the typewriter on the desk and creepy elevator-esque music playing in the background. Every time someone walked outside of the wellness room I would imagine it was a zombie, or some other creature lurking about. Of course whenever people walked by the wellness room talking coherent English it kind of threw my vision haywire, but hey.

MY POINT IS (ahem) if I can LARP I’m in Resident Evil while stuck  in a lame office building, chances are if I’m put into a BUILDING that is based off of one of Resident Evil’s most recognized settings, then, um, chances are I would go batshit crazy and scare all of the patrons off. So, like, I should go there because clearly that’s where I belong.

Don’t judge me, bro.