I NEED to be kissed underneath this

What? Did you expect a picture of Alistair in a loin cloth or something? 

Isn’t it rooomaaantiiic?! @Shannonin and @GeekyHostess introduced me to this beautiful item of Christmas décor, and I cannot express in words how badly this needs to be in my life.  

I know it’s supposed to be a tree ornament, but eff that noise; I want this hanging above the entrance to my hallway. It would probably stay up all year too (just like that 8-bit Christmas Wreath from ThinkGeek) and it would be grand, for every time I see it A) I’d either be getting kissed or B) I would mind-LARP and imagine that the festive toe was a trophy of the very first zombie I ever killed. 

Yes. I can see it now:

It was a dark and chilly night, it was, and I had spotted an old barn a few hundred yards away. I crept through the tall grass (the owner of the property had probably been dead for several months and unable to, you know, mow it) knowing damn well every step I took might be my last.  Somehow I made it to the barn unscathed and without incident. I pressed my ear against barn doors and listened for several minutes. Nothing. I slowly lifted the makeshift lock (a wooden plank) and set it down. But before I could open the doors and take a peek inside, a DECAYING BRAIN-HUNGRY ZOMBIE PUSHED BUSTED THROUGH AND TRIED TO GRAB AT ME AAAAHHHHHH!

And that’s when I promptly pulled out a screwdriver and stabbed it in the eye. I also happened to have some Holly in my pocket, so I cut off the sucker’s toe and made—wait for it— a mistletoe. GET IT? A mistletoe out of an actual toe. …Psssh. I thought it was clever 

If you want this awesome product for yourself (and you know you do) head over to NeatoShop and pick one up. Then send pix.

<3 Britt

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  • ZOmbie toe lol
    I can make two puns right now

    but it wont 😀

  • dmann

    How would you like me to kiss you under that :)?