Boots’ Guest Game Log #4: – Dragon Age: Origins

 Hey guys!  My buddy Tony (AKA Boots) is popping his Dragon Age: Origins cherry and has graciously volunteered to keep a guest game log. This will work similar to the logs I keep, but you know I need to add in my own snarky remarks in red 😉

Boots’ Guest Game Log #4: – Dragon Age: Origins

For those of you who don’t know… THIS GAME LOG CONTAINS MAJOR-ASS SPOILERS THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOREVER (in Ferelden)!!! Proceed at your own risk! 

I have revisited this game quite often since the last update, and I have to admit, it’s growing on me. There were, however, some major growing pains. For now, let’s talk about where Viktor left off… 

[HAHAHAHA. Bitch. Told you it would.]

It was time to light the beacon at the top of the Tower of Ishal. Alistair whined about having to leave the main battle down below (pansy) and we ventured forth to the top. Of course, Alistair also complained about the darkspawn inside, so he’s just being a sissy bitch all over the place. Just fight, you big baby! 

[Okay, I’m convinced you’re just trying to piss me off, Boots, AND IT’S WORKING. Why is Alistair a pansy for NOT wanting to leave the battle below – a battle which is SUICIDE?!!!! YOU ARE THE PANSY! Ahem. ::fans self::]

We eventually made our way to the top floor where there was an epic battle with an ogre. It wasn’t that difficult of a fight, but I was very happy to see Viktor jump at the ogre while plunging his blade deep into the beast’s chest, then proceed to stab him through the forehead when he was down. It was beautiful. Sexy, even.

So the beacon was lit, and Loghain was gonna march in with his army and wipe out this pansy-ass wave of darkspawn and save Ferelden from doom. I couldn’t wait to see this epic battle. Loghain surveyed the situation, analyzed his strategy… and left.

Wow, great battle plan you got there.

DUDE! WHAT THE HELL, BRO?!

Now this jagoff is going around saying that the Grey Wardens killed King Cailan and betrayed the land? Yo buddy… FUCK YOU! Of course, darkspawn also invaded the tower and over took Alistair and I. It sucked. We got beat up bad, but we awoke in a strange hut with Morrigan and her mother, Flemeth, who was supposedly some fabled witch of lore. After dealing with her headache for saving us, she basically told her daughter to eff off and join us as we set out to clear the name of the Wardens and stop Loghain. Morrigan wasn’t too thrilled, but she’s stuck with us, now. 

[DON’T YOU HATE LOGHAIN?! God. That bastard. I’ll keep it spoiler free, but if you’re interested in the backstory/lore of DA:O you should for seriously check out the novels written by Gaider. They are so gooood, and it provides some depth to Loghain.]

Following a lead to Lothering, we ran into some stupid bandits trying to force a toll on us. I was able to persuade them to let us by, cuz you don’t fuck with the Grey Wardens, son. Of course, that peace didn’t last long when I tried to open their storage chest. They drew their swords, but they were no match for me and my new friends. The leader burned as I chuckled at his feeble skills.

[HAHAHAHA. I could just see you going over there and trying to loot the chest. “Hmm, don’t mind if I do…”]

In the town is where the game started to hook into me. Finally I was given a few areas to roam through and several quests to accomplish. I had a lot of fun making Morrigan change into a spider as I backstabbed many bad dudes. Hell, I even picked up a couple new party members along the way in Leliana and the giant Qunari warrior, Sten. He’s got corn rows.

The definition of “sliver fox.”

[YES!!! I’m so glad you picked up Sten. If you didn’t at Lothering you never would have been able to. SQUEE! And yes, a silver fox. We were, like, besties in my playthrough. <3]

After Lothering, it was decided that we needed to use the Grey Warden treaties to recruit the different clans of Ferelden to our aid, so I had free reign to go anywhere I chose to begin the process. Instead of getting right at it, though, I decided to just hack away at sidequests as much as possible and headed to Denerim. This was both a good and bad idea.

I mean, I like sidequests, but it feels like I can’t walk 2 steps without picking up a new one. I’m beginning to think that this game will never end with all the duties I have to cover, but it’s for the glory of Ferelden and the honor of the Grey Wardens. Even if all I have to do is buy a bunch of toxin extracts, I WILL DO SO!

[Yeah dude, I feel you. It’s a LOT easier to do them as you pick ‘em up, because as the story evolves some of the quests won’t be doable anymore and you’ll be stuck with incomplete quests in your queue. And THAT sucks.] 

It was nice, however, to see a familiar face. Imagine my surprise when I ran into my former second, GORIM! My bro-from-down-below (in the depths of Orzamaar, you sickos) was living a good life selling Dwarven-crafted armor and weapons. Good quality shit, too. Much of it too expensive and beyond my skill level to wield, unfortunately. Still, he looked happy, and that was good to find out.

Dwarves have killer beards.

I explored much of the city that was available to me and picked up on contracts to fulfill, but one in particular involving a group of rampant Blood Mages gave me fits. It wasn’t pretty at all, other than the fact that it gave my friend Cammy a chance to pick on me for days.

This is also where I began to confront problems with the game that sent me into a rage for a good 4 hours. I was NOT a happy camper… but I’ll get into that next time in great detail. No one is safe!

[OSNAP.]

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  • Can ya really blame me? At least he found the wheel, eventually…

    • Boots_33

      You be quiet, you!!
      Wait till next blog…