Always Use Protection


If this ever happened to me I would probably marry whoever or whatever it was that pulled this stunt. First of all, owning a HOLOGRAPHIC (too bad it ain’t first edition) Charizard makes almost anyone marriage material. Second, keeping the card in one’s pants at all time definitely makes a person marriage material. AND THE FACT THAT HOMEBOY WOULD PULL IT IT OUT WHEN I ASKED FOR PROTECTION WOULD FORCE ME TO PROPOSE RIGHT THEN AND THERE. Seriously, with a Charizard on your nightstand NO ONE or NOTHING can ever harm you.

Why do you think I caught E. Coli and was hospitalized in Mexico? I didn’t bring my Charizard card.

e coli

Those aren’t any horns I’m throwing up. THOSE ARE CHARIZARD HORNS.

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